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Regret (Prompt #27) | Inuyasha
Collection Title: Fleeting
Genre: Drama/Romance
Rating: T
Summary:Right now, this is just a collection of various oneshots/drabbles for this prompt table. There is currently no plan for a overarching storyline that I'm working towards (for a change, LOL). Oh, who the hell am I kidding, this has turned into a serial of connected oneshots within the same universe, LOL. I don't know if it will stretch to fit all 30 prompts, but for now, this is a continuous story. (I fail. So hard.)
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un_love_you Prompt Table here. Prompt for this piece is: #27: (Author’s Choice): “I miss you.”
Title: Regret
Universe: Alternate (modern era)
Rating: T
Word Count: 2076
Pairing: Sesshoumaru/Kagome
Summary: Separately, Sesshoumaru & Kagome reach similar conclusions.
Author’s Note: Fifth in a series. Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4
Disclaimer: The Inuyasha concept, story, and characters are copyright Rumiko Takahashi and Viz Media.
~*~
She ran.
It was no surprise, really; for all his talent at diplomacy, he might as well be a block of wood. It was part of the reason he was taking this course in the first place: one couldn’t be a successful merger negotiator if one didn’t have an excellent set of cross- (double-) talking skills at one’s disposal.
Admittedly, he could’ve couched his words better, though – there was really no need to add insult to injury. He had just let his irritation get the best of him, that’s all. Her heartbroken gasp of shock was all the punishment he needed to concede that maybe it had been a bit of a jerky thing to say. Jerky or not, it got him what he wanted: some peace and quiet to finish his damned thesis chapter.
He didn’t realize the full consequences of his words until the next day.
He’d spent most of the day in his advisor’s office, sweating over the solution he managed to haphazard together at the last minute. Somehow, being unhappy with it himself made the criticism that flowed from this so-called ‘expert of the field’ easier to handle. And boy, was there a river full of it this time, most of it (he grudgingly admitted) well deserved.
However, he was in luck: Christmas was approaching, and the rest of the world was slowly grinding to a halt for it. That meant extra time to get this portion of his paper in shape before tackling the next bit, due when classes resumed in January. He went immediately home, full of determination and resolve to get a head start.
How long he worked, he wasn’t sure, but gradually he became aware that there was no other movement around the apartment. Kagome had left early that morning, before he was even out of bed, and he figured she might be gone most of the day. The previous evening’s events had been very strained, even to his generally oblivious standards.
He put the thought out of his mind, making himself a quick dinner before resuming his revisions. It was only after midnight had come and gone, and he was readying himself for bed, that he realized –
She was gone.
He didn’t know what to think. After all, wasn’t this what he wanted – total peace and quiet, time to himself, away from the hassle of dealing with others? Time to devote to his thesis, his master plan, his future? Wasn’t that the most important thing right now?
He was washing his dishes when it hit him – or, more to the point, when he hit his head against the slightly ajar door of her tea cabinet. He glanced up sharply, but found his gaze lingering. Somehow, knowing that her things were still there brought forth a surge of relief. She isn’t gone for good, he thought wistfully.
He shook himself, turning his attention back to his dishes. “Of course she isn’t,” he mused aloud. “I’d know if she had left forever. She wasn’t exactly ‘quiet’ when she moved in, at least.” A tiny smile played at the corner of his lips as he finished, turning off the tap and drying his hands on a towel. The wisp of memory floated at the periphery of his mind: she had been quite clumsy, bringing loads more things than he expected, especially considering she had been in student housing before signing the contract to rent out his spare room. But she had been quite good-humored about the whole thing, apologizing profusely for disturbing him and swearing it would never happen again.
For the most part, she lived up to that promise.
Then Halloween night happened, a party that lived up to its ‘life-changing’ billing in quite a few respects.
It was funny; until then, he had thought of her as an amusing but considerate roommate, someone who managed to share his living quarters exactly as he wished: with minimal fuss or muss. They didn’t spend a great deal of time together, but managed to find a comfortable space to share the common room on occasion – she watching some stupid TV show while he relaxed with the newspaper.
Since then, however…things had certainly changed. Their shared silence was no longer comfortable and mutual. He knew she’d suffered some sort of social fallout after that disastrous party, but he’d be damned if he was going to let anybody take advantage of her right in front of him. He didn’t regret those actions – or actions that came later that same evening.
He sighed, reaching up to close the cabinet before leaving the room. Somehow, it just wasn’t the same without her milling about, awkward strain or no. He stood there for several moments, fingers latched around the knob, contemplating, analyzing.
I miss her, he thought, staring at the door of the cabinet. Even the reassurance that she would eventually come back was not enough to erase the dull ache that had spread throughout his chest in the last few moments. The realization stunned him: how was it that he, who had consciously been a loner for the grand majority of his life, could actually miss someone? Especially someone who had spent the last few weeks being attractive and distracting, in the moments when he had no time to pursue either avenue?
And yet, strange as it seemed, that was exactly what was happening.
He opened the cabinet, examining her collection of teas. Boxes of tea bags were stored haphazardly on the top shelf, while tins of loose leaves cluttered the bottom. It was a veritable compendium, all major kinds represented – from their native green tea, to English breakfast tea, to Chinese oolong, to flavored teas from Europe. Exotic herbal infusions were tucked away in their own corner.
Before he realized it, he was holding an almost-empty box, a familiar fragrance drifting up to his nose. Peppermint. He rifled through the bags, jarring the leaves further, making the sweet scent stronger. It enveloped him, and for a moment, he was undeniably happy – but strangely melancholic, at the same time.
Silently, he moved to the stove, setting her kettle ablaze. As the water heated, he prepared his cup. He hadn’t made tea for himself in a very long time, but the routine was as oddly comforting as it was rusty.
He sat at the table a few moments later, staring into the middle distance as the tea steeped. I wonder where she went, he mused silently. I wonder when she’s coming back.
He sipped the hot liquid slowly, savoring the minty coolness against his tongue. Somehow, it alleviated the sting of her absence. It was hard for him to pinpoint exactly why it bothered him so much. Was it because she had reacted as any normal person would to his callous words? Was it because he had expected her to stand up to him instead?
Or was it because she’d left without telling him?
As if he had a right to know. He didn’t own her.
He just…lived with her.
And now, as he sat there in the dark, he realized just how alone he was without her.
~*~
She ran.
It was probably a stupid move, but she felt like she had no other choice, given the circumstances. Her emotions were running high after the fight, and her rush of goodwill had been thoroughly crushed by his rejection. Her poor heart (or was that her pride?) couldn’t take any more, so she ran.
Kagome sighed as she stared into her cup. The only place she had to go was her parents’, and they were on vacation – meaning her flight wasn’t merely across the city to her childhood home, but to the swanky seen-and-be-seen ski resort in the northern part of the country. She hadn’t wanted to accompany them this year, because she was tired of this scene, with its abundance of posturing jerks for guys and snottily vain girls. It was all about appearances here, who knew who, who was related to who, blah blah blah.
Needs more alcohol, she thought, watching the chocolate swirl in the mug. They didn’t serve tea at this resort – only coffee and chocolate, as these were considered “luxurious” beverages. After a hard day on the slopes, skiers apparently only wanted something either sickeningly sweet or terrifyingly bitter to quench their thirst. Tea was the common man’s drink, and her obsession with it was her own little rebellion.
“Are you sure you don’t want to join us?”
Her mother’s voice broke through Kagome’s musings. She glanced up to see her parents and little brother standing before her, decked out in the latest and greatest ski gear. This being an annual family outing, they were all excellent at the sport, enjoying the challenge of the black diamond trails.
“I’m sure,” she replied, giving them a weak smile. She sucked at anything that required more coordination than moving her body to the beat of a song.
Her mother put a ski-gloved hand on her shoulder. “I’m glad you decided to join us after all, but I hate seeing you just sitting around all the time. You will tell us if something’s bothering you and ruining your fun, won’t you?”
“Of course, Mama,” she replied, patting her mother’s hand. Meaning, of course, I won’t.
“Good,” her mother confirmed, straightening once more. She sent the rest of their family ahead before giving a cursory glance around the room. “If you’re going to stay in the lodge all day, why don’t you make good use of your time? There are plenty of young men from the most eligible families hanging about…”
“Sure,” she agreed with a tight smile, swirling the mug in her hands again. I’d rather die than date one of these losers, she vowed silently, waving at her mother as she finally left to conquer the slopes.
It was pathetic, really; she had run away to escape the situation, to leave him and her hurt feelings in the dust. So why was it, now that she was here and half an island away from him, that all she could think about was him?
It had been almost a week since their last conversation, but his words still stung. “You’re a sweet kid, but not my type” – God, was there a worse way to be rejected, than told so plainly? And on top of the humiliation from Koga’s words, no less! Geez, he really knew when to pick his moments, didn’t he?
And yet…
…there was some small piece of her that was unwilling to give up hope. He likes you, it whispered to her in the back of her mind. Actions speak louder than words. What about Halloween – that look was no lie! And he allowed you to kiss him, that has to mean something!
She still wasn’t sure what to make of that one-sided kiss. He never actually acknowledged it, so was he even aware that it had happened? He had been asleep, after all. It made his warnings to leave him alone seem less cryptic – not to mention, her own actions less pathetic – if he was unaware of it. But he struck her as the type of person who was hardly ever not aware of what was going on around him, whether he chose to formally acknowledge it or not.
What can I do to prove to him I’m more than just an insipid little girl? she wondered, again disrupting her mug, watching the grainy mixture ebb and flow. Maybe there was no use in fighting it: crushes always won out, in the absence of solid evidence.
“Oh, God,” she mumbled, covering her face with her hands. I’ve truly done it this time – reached new depths in the patheticness department! I can’t believe I actually think I have a chance with him! And yet…God, I can’t stop wanting him, no matter how hard I try! She could feel the flush of embarrassment creeping up the back of her neck, even as she sat there in a room full of nominal acquaintances.
“Well, this is a surprise,” came a voice from behind.
Kagome froze, absolutely mortified that someone had been paying attention to her tiny display of personal meltdown. Slowly, she eased up to glance over her shoulder. Her eyes widened and her heart stopped as she took in the full presence of the person standing there.
“Oh my God!” she gasped, unable to hide her surprise. “What are you doing here?!”
Genre: Drama/Romance
Rating: T
Summary:
un_love_you Prompt Table here. Prompt for this piece is: #27: (Author’s Choice): “I miss you.”Title: Regret
Universe: Alternate (modern era)
Rating: T
Word Count: 2076
Pairing: Sesshoumaru/Kagome
Summary: Separately, Sesshoumaru & Kagome reach similar conclusions.
Author’s Note: Fifth in a series. Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4
Disclaimer: The Inuyasha concept, story, and characters are copyright Rumiko Takahashi and Viz Media.
She ran.
It was no surprise, really; for all his talent at diplomacy, he might as well be a block of wood. It was part of the reason he was taking this course in the first place: one couldn’t be a successful merger negotiator if one didn’t have an excellent set of cross- (double-) talking skills at one’s disposal.
Admittedly, he could’ve couched his words better, though – there was really no need to add insult to injury. He had just let his irritation get the best of him, that’s all. Her heartbroken gasp of shock was all the punishment he needed to concede that maybe it had been a bit of a jerky thing to say. Jerky or not, it got him what he wanted: some peace and quiet to finish his damned thesis chapter.
He didn’t realize the full consequences of his words until the next day.
He’d spent most of the day in his advisor’s office, sweating over the solution he managed to haphazard together at the last minute. Somehow, being unhappy with it himself made the criticism that flowed from this so-called ‘expert of the field’ easier to handle. And boy, was there a river full of it this time, most of it (he grudgingly admitted) well deserved.
However, he was in luck: Christmas was approaching, and the rest of the world was slowly grinding to a halt for it. That meant extra time to get this portion of his paper in shape before tackling the next bit, due when classes resumed in January. He went immediately home, full of determination and resolve to get a head start.
How long he worked, he wasn’t sure, but gradually he became aware that there was no other movement around the apartment. Kagome had left early that morning, before he was even out of bed, and he figured she might be gone most of the day. The previous evening’s events had been very strained, even to his generally oblivious standards.
He put the thought out of his mind, making himself a quick dinner before resuming his revisions. It was only after midnight had come and gone, and he was readying himself for bed, that he realized –
She was gone.
He didn’t know what to think. After all, wasn’t this what he wanted – total peace and quiet, time to himself, away from the hassle of dealing with others? Time to devote to his thesis, his master plan, his future? Wasn’t that the most important thing right now?
He was washing his dishes when it hit him – or, more to the point, when he hit his head against the slightly ajar door of her tea cabinet. He glanced up sharply, but found his gaze lingering. Somehow, knowing that her things were still there brought forth a surge of relief. She isn’t gone for good, he thought wistfully.
He shook himself, turning his attention back to his dishes. “Of course she isn’t,” he mused aloud. “I’d know if she had left forever. She wasn’t exactly ‘quiet’ when she moved in, at least.” A tiny smile played at the corner of his lips as he finished, turning off the tap and drying his hands on a towel. The wisp of memory floated at the periphery of his mind: she had been quite clumsy, bringing loads more things than he expected, especially considering she had been in student housing before signing the contract to rent out his spare room. But she had been quite good-humored about the whole thing, apologizing profusely for disturbing him and swearing it would never happen again.
For the most part, she lived up to that promise.
Then Halloween night happened, a party that lived up to its ‘life-changing’ billing in quite a few respects.
It was funny; until then, he had thought of her as an amusing but considerate roommate, someone who managed to share his living quarters exactly as he wished: with minimal fuss or muss. They didn’t spend a great deal of time together, but managed to find a comfortable space to share the common room on occasion – she watching some stupid TV show while he relaxed with the newspaper.
Since then, however…things had certainly changed. Their shared silence was no longer comfortable and mutual. He knew she’d suffered some sort of social fallout after that disastrous party, but he’d be damned if he was going to let anybody take advantage of her right in front of him. He didn’t regret those actions – or actions that came later that same evening.
He sighed, reaching up to close the cabinet before leaving the room. Somehow, it just wasn’t the same without her milling about, awkward strain or no. He stood there for several moments, fingers latched around the knob, contemplating, analyzing.
I miss her, he thought, staring at the door of the cabinet. Even the reassurance that she would eventually come back was not enough to erase the dull ache that had spread throughout his chest in the last few moments. The realization stunned him: how was it that he, who had consciously been a loner for the grand majority of his life, could actually miss someone? Especially someone who had spent the last few weeks being attractive and distracting, in the moments when he had no time to pursue either avenue?
And yet, strange as it seemed, that was exactly what was happening.
He opened the cabinet, examining her collection of teas. Boxes of tea bags were stored haphazardly on the top shelf, while tins of loose leaves cluttered the bottom. It was a veritable compendium, all major kinds represented – from their native green tea, to English breakfast tea, to Chinese oolong, to flavored teas from Europe. Exotic herbal infusions were tucked away in their own corner.
Before he realized it, he was holding an almost-empty box, a familiar fragrance drifting up to his nose. Peppermint. He rifled through the bags, jarring the leaves further, making the sweet scent stronger. It enveloped him, and for a moment, he was undeniably happy – but strangely melancholic, at the same time.
Silently, he moved to the stove, setting her kettle ablaze. As the water heated, he prepared his cup. He hadn’t made tea for himself in a very long time, but the routine was as oddly comforting as it was rusty.
He sat at the table a few moments later, staring into the middle distance as the tea steeped. I wonder where she went, he mused silently. I wonder when she’s coming back.
He sipped the hot liquid slowly, savoring the minty coolness against his tongue. Somehow, it alleviated the sting of her absence. It was hard for him to pinpoint exactly why it bothered him so much. Was it because she had reacted as any normal person would to his callous words? Was it because he had expected her to stand up to him instead?
Or was it because she’d left without telling him?
As if he had a right to know. He didn’t own her.
He just…lived with her.
And now, as he sat there in the dark, he realized just how alone he was without her.
She ran.
It was probably a stupid move, but she felt like she had no other choice, given the circumstances. Her emotions were running high after the fight, and her rush of goodwill had been thoroughly crushed by his rejection. Her poor heart (or was that her pride?) couldn’t take any more, so she ran.
Kagome sighed as she stared into her cup. The only place she had to go was her parents’, and they were on vacation – meaning her flight wasn’t merely across the city to her childhood home, but to the swanky seen-and-be-seen ski resort in the northern part of the country. She hadn’t wanted to accompany them this year, because she was tired of this scene, with its abundance of posturing jerks for guys and snottily vain girls. It was all about appearances here, who knew who, who was related to who, blah blah blah.
Needs more alcohol, she thought, watching the chocolate swirl in the mug. They didn’t serve tea at this resort – only coffee and chocolate, as these were considered “luxurious” beverages. After a hard day on the slopes, skiers apparently only wanted something either sickeningly sweet or terrifyingly bitter to quench their thirst. Tea was the common man’s drink, and her obsession with it was her own little rebellion.
“Are you sure you don’t want to join us?”
Her mother’s voice broke through Kagome’s musings. She glanced up to see her parents and little brother standing before her, decked out in the latest and greatest ski gear. This being an annual family outing, they were all excellent at the sport, enjoying the challenge of the black diamond trails.
“I’m sure,” she replied, giving them a weak smile. She sucked at anything that required more coordination than moving her body to the beat of a song.
Her mother put a ski-gloved hand on her shoulder. “I’m glad you decided to join us after all, but I hate seeing you just sitting around all the time. You will tell us if something’s bothering you and ruining your fun, won’t you?”
“Of course, Mama,” she replied, patting her mother’s hand. Meaning, of course, I won’t.
“Good,” her mother confirmed, straightening once more. She sent the rest of their family ahead before giving a cursory glance around the room. “If you’re going to stay in the lodge all day, why don’t you make good use of your time? There are plenty of young men from the most eligible families hanging about…”
“Sure,” she agreed with a tight smile, swirling the mug in her hands again. I’d rather die than date one of these losers, she vowed silently, waving at her mother as she finally left to conquer the slopes.
It was pathetic, really; she had run away to escape the situation, to leave him and her hurt feelings in the dust. So why was it, now that she was here and half an island away from him, that all she could think about was him?
It had been almost a week since their last conversation, but his words still stung. “You’re a sweet kid, but not my type” – God, was there a worse way to be rejected, than told so plainly? And on top of the humiliation from Koga’s words, no less! Geez, he really knew when to pick his moments, didn’t he?
And yet…
…there was some small piece of her that was unwilling to give up hope. He likes you, it whispered to her in the back of her mind. Actions speak louder than words. What about Halloween – that look was no lie! And he allowed you to kiss him, that has to mean something!
She still wasn’t sure what to make of that one-sided kiss. He never actually acknowledged it, so was he even aware that it had happened? He had been asleep, after all. It made his warnings to leave him alone seem less cryptic – not to mention, her own actions less pathetic – if he was unaware of it. But he struck her as the type of person who was hardly ever not aware of what was going on around him, whether he chose to formally acknowledge it or not.
What can I do to prove to him I’m more than just an insipid little girl? she wondered, again disrupting her mug, watching the grainy mixture ebb and flow. Maybe there was no use in fighting it: crushes always won out, in the absence of solid evidence.
“Oh, God,” she mumbled, covering her face with her hands. I’ve truly done it this time – reached new depths in the patheticness department! I can’t believe I actually think I have a chance with him! And yet…God, I can’t stop wanting him, no matter how hard I try! She could feel the flush of embarrassment creeping up the back of her neck, even as she sat there in a room full of nominal acquaintances.
“Well, this is a surprise,” came a voice from behind.
Kagome froze, absolutely mortified that someone had been paying attention to her tiny display of personal meltdown. Slowly, she eased up to glance over her shoulder. Her eyes widened and her heart stopped as she took in the full presence of the person standing there.
“Oh my God!” she gasped, unable to hide her surprise. “What are you doing here?!”
no subject
I absolutely love this series, it's very mature and entertaining!
no subject
I can't spoil the surprise, although the reaction I've gotten from my (wonderful!) reviewers isn't quite what I expected it to be. You guys were supposed to leap to the most obvious conclusion! /joke
*sigh* Oh, well, I guess that's what happens when you write it backwards and can't fill in the gaps as originally planned...
no subject
This was really wonderful. I'm glad the time apart allowed them to reflect on what their relationship was evolving into.
The scene with the tea was great. The idea of doing something as simple as making tea and allowing it to have such a profound effect really gives Sessy a depth not normally seen. You are doing a really great job of keeping his personality but making him so much more human.
I loved my banner!! I'm so thrilled and honored!!
no subject
:D Hehe, can you tell I've become addicted to peppermint tea? It's perfect for the holiday season, and naturally caffeine free, so I can drink it at any point in the day, and still sleep at night - very important, LOL.
I thought it was an interesting image to use, a unique way to "show" instead of "tell". I never know how well my experiments are working until someone comments on them - so thanks!
One of my FF.net reviewers mentioned this as well, how it was unexpected for Sesshoumaru to regret his actions. For me, it's not so much that he regrets it, but that he's surprised that he misses her. I can totally picture him acting like this, even in canon, when he comes across an emotion previously unfelt - a great big WTF?! LOL.
Oy, but I babble...
I loved my banner!! I'm so thrilled and honored!!
:D :D :D Yay!!! The hardest part is figuring out how to do the lettering, I think. With a limited amount of fonts you have to do a lot of trial and error. But I'm soooooo glad you like it because I was definitely worried that you wouldn't...